The Funk
For the past several years, I’ve been in a funk. Years! I hate to admit it, but it’s true and it may sound familiar to you, too. The specifics will vary for everyone, but there comes a time to face it: a funk’s a funk!
Here’s how it went down for me. A few years ago, we moved to New Mexico from Texas, I changed occupations, and I struggled through a deconstruction/reconstruction of my faith. Now here’s the funny part; I didn’t realize what was going on. I just looked up after some time had passed and realized that I was internally off-balance. Sort of like vertigo. I didn’t ask for this funk and the amazing part in retrospect, is it caught me off-guard.
I could fight it, but hey, I chose this move and there was no going back. In an unwitting way, I stepped right into this funk-producing-transition without realizing all that’d be asked or required of me.
So, here’s where I’ve landed: We must embrace change as a natural way of life. And, change has this way of throwing us into a funk. Somehow, we have to become comfortable with the uncomfortable of changing.
But here’s the rub: we naturally resist change; I know I do. We naturally resist discomfort and especially the unknown that change brings with it. But when we’re in the middle of it, it can produce a profound funk! Our culture depends upon and rewards stability; however, when stability cements itself into rigidity and closed-mindedness, it falls prey to self-centeredness and divisive thinking.
Change is actually the norm. Whether a major life transition, job change, or something as small as an “upgrade” on my mobile phone service, change is inevitably going to happen. Nature demonstrates the principle of change as the seasons yield to one another (though not without a struggle!). Nothing actually stays the same. From moment to moment, our bodies change, adapting to our environment and becoming more at peace with the change. We call this homeostasis, and it’s actually healthy.
Change follows a predictable pattern that we must learn to trust: the Order-Disorder-Reorder Cycle, as coined by author, Richard Rohr.
image per jennygranberry.com
Order is a state of stability and a vantage point from which we view ourselves and the world around us. It’s all that we take for granted in life, our circumstances, even if those circumstances aren’t optimal. Order is great as long as it lasts, but we all know that everything changes and nothing lasts forever, whether we choose it or not. Folks that hold onto life at this stage too firmly wind up as either willingly naïve or control freaks (or some strange combination of both.)
When our Order is challenged or disrupted, it’s our instinct to fight it, trying to re-establish our familiar Ordered position. But many times, there’s no going back and we find ourselves moving into Disorder. It may seem that there’s no way out, but the truth is we must keep going forward no matter how hard or unlikely it may seem. The truth is that real growth, personal, relational, spiritual, or physical occurs through the unlikely path of Disorder. Getting stuck in Disorder produces the funk. This is what happened to me when I made the rather dramatic move in career and location. I had to recognize what was going on and ask myself, “Will I embrace this change and follow it through, or fight it the whole way?” That’s the critical choice!
We must trust that Reorder is right around the corner. Rest assured that Reorder is not a return to the old state of Order. Reorder is a new and spacious realm that’s all the richer because we’ve journeyed through the struggle of Disorder. We’ve learned something, adapted to something, even grown up a little more. Reorder is the breath of fresh air after the struggle.
Let’s face it, change is coming whether we like it or not. We don’t get to jump from Order to Reorder without the necessary journey through Disorder. We can either embrace the inevitable changes or resist them to our own detriment. If we are not growing, we are declining. Nothing is static…not in the world as we know it! So, here’s a few suggestions for navigating change and not getting stuck in a funk:
1. Embrace the mystery that presents itself into your life. What is it asking of me? What is it offering me? Where is it leading me? I’ve found it’s ok to ask the hard questions. It’s actually a healthy and robust way to approach life.
2. Adapt to Change with a willing spirit that says, “Yes.” As the Alcoholics Anonymous saying goes, “If you find yourself in the valley of the shadow of death, don’t stop. KEEP GOING!”
3. Anticipate Reorder into a greater existence and consciousness. This is the navigation map of wisdom.
Now here’s the good news: it gets easier with practice! I’ve come to see my Life Change with fresh eyes and excitement, finding a new and more dynamic balance. Yes, I sometimes revert to the vertigo of Disorder, but it’s a process that I’m embracing and finding new life in! We’ll all face changes in life, and I believe we can navigate them successfully!